The New

Yesterday I was hit with a terrifying sort of reality (in a good way) when my friends Wyoming and Dayton and I began to talk seriously about moving in together. Me and Wyoming have been talking about living together for months, and because I spend so much of my time with her, I inevitably see her boyfriend Dayton pretty often as well. Granted, I knew Dayton from high school, because we had classes together, but we actually get along now, which is a recent development. The whole plan is half hypothetical, because I don't have steady employment (I usually managed to make cash during the summertime through internships, but no year-long employment yet) and a few other things have to sort of fall into place for everything to go well.
I said that it was terrifying because as exciting as it is, I can't help but be kind of scared when everything comes down to it. Moving out of my house ASAP has always been my plan, because my parents moved out of their parents' house when they were 18 and I've already got them beat by a year, and if things don't work out this summer I'll probably be 20 when everything comes to fruition. But change has never been something that I've taken to well and when it comes right down to it, the thought of being financially responsible for keeping myself, well, alive... its not completely cheerful all the time. Actually its a little be more like.. "oh fuck... I'm going to forget to feed myself and then I'm going to starve like the fruitbat I've always known that I am".
But in the same breath, I am unbelievably excited. This is something that I've wanted to do for years and years and years. Wyoming and Dayton are two people who I trust. We have similar interests and are all equally responsible when everything comes down to it. Living together feels like it would be an amazing experience to share. To even be able to talk hypotheticals with the two of them has been thrilling and exciting and when I think about it I almost become giddy.
Now all I have to do is find a job to pay my share! (And to stop watching A Haunting, which features plenty of episodes about apartment buildings built on an axe-murderers old hunting area from the 1800's which now feature angry spirits who somehow always prey on the teenager.)